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Reclaiming My Life

A little more than a month ago, I started this new blog on a whim (well, not really – I explained my reasons here). I also explained why the name “A Joyful Mess” charmed me, but really, the name was also reflective of my present situation.

Life is messy.

I’ve accepted and embraced living a messy life because I realised that the more I acknowledged the mess, the more I’m allowing God to be in control of the clean-up. I’m nothing but a weak human being who messes up, imperfect. And I love it. I love calling to my God whenever I feel that life is becoming too much for me to handle. I love knowing that God is always there, always there to supply the strength to my weakness, unlimited grace to my flawed human nature.

However…

There are some — many — aspects of my life that I couldn’t afford to mess up any further. I need to acknowledge the truth that for these aspects of my life, it’s not normal living that took course. It’s laziness and lack of planning, pure and simple.

I need to work on these aspects of my life. I need to reclaim and return some sense of organisation to my life!

Last year couldn’t be more different than this year. During the past couple of years, I had the privilege of having a yaya to look after Yuri. I also enjoyed working on a freelance status, where I could start working whenever I’m available and stop working whenever I needed to without having to seek someone to ask for permission.

It was near the end of last year when we ran into trouble with our yaya. It was well-documented in my old blog with more than a few people following it haha (if you’re curious, you can read it). Since then, I haven’t found a new replacement yet, so I’ve been looking after my pre-schooler while working full-time.

And early this year, from working freelance, I’ve become employed full-time under an Australian company. Now, I need to start and end work following a relatively stricter schedule.

Later, I also passed the board exam and became a licenced real estate broker.

I’m thankful to be able to look after my son while earning a steady stream of income. However, I cannot deny that with these responsibilities, I also neglected a lot of other things.

YURI

For example, when Yuri was still too young to go to school, I could not stop thinking about it and planning for it. Even the more sensible Job had to give in to my desire of homeschooling Yuri at 3 years old. That’s right; I’d been planning to homeschool Yuri when he turns 3. Now that he is 3, we haven’t done an ounce of formal homeschooling yet.

When June came, I found myself unprepared to homeschool, so I decided to move it to August. It’s the middle of August now and I’m hopeless.

And from reading to him 2-3 times a day, I’m ashamed to tell you that it became erratic. I can’t even remember the last time we actually focused on a book.

HEALTH

Last year, I was always cooking and experimenting in the kitchen – easy peasy recipes, I know, but still. Now, I can’t remember the last time I’ve cooked something. I haven’t been able to closely monitor what Yuri eats, and we’re resorting to eating ready-made food more and more often. I can’t remember the last time I made fresh smoothies!

I’ve also gained a lot of weight this year because I already stopped nursing Yuri, I haven’t watched my food intake, and I haven’t worked out since January.

HOUSE

Our house is also dismal to look at. We have someone going to our house to clean 1-2 times per week, but for the remaining days of the week, the house just looks tragic. With a pre-schooler, a full-time job, and a real estate business to keep me busy, most of the time, I simply cannot afford to give the floor a sweeping.

GOD

God should be my number-one priority, but I’m ashamed to admit that he has not been mine for a time now. I know it, and Job knows it, so he’s been trying to remind me every single time he can. There are no excuses for my negligence.

divider

If I continue my list, this post would be too long. Writing this made me realise that there really are a lot of aspects in my life that I need to work on. I wish I could work on my blog more often. I wish I could have the time to update my planner and calendar (which have been updated last May and last July, respectively). I wish I could give more time to updating our real estate blog and page. I wish I could have time to work out. I wish I do not have to be too exhausted every night to pray and read the Bible!

And I can’t even say I’m being too hard on myself. These things should have been non-negotiable; I should be able to take care of these stuff!

I’ve made baby steps like regularly using my Todoist and installing a calendar for my blog. However, these only took care of my “tasks.” I wish I knew how to organise my life (Lord, help), but I know my capacity is limited. I’m only attempting to manage my time so that I wouldn’t neglect the important things anymore. At least, I’ll be able to gain some sort of order.

Super mums, what do you do to organise your life and have time for all the important things?

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15 Comments

  • Reply Gilian August 17, 2015 at 2:07 pm

    I can relate to some of your situations. Especially the mom part. =) I have two boys now and joggling all the tasks can be pretty difficult at times. I make mistakes and a lot of mess sometimes, but giving up is not an option for moms. =) Thank God, He can turn our mess into a great message. =) Keep inspiring. =)
    Gilian recently posted…Electricity Tariff Rates in Saudi Arabia ~ Life in Saudi ArabiaMy Profile

  • Reply Aci August 17, 2015 at 3:24 pm

    Good thing my mom keeps me on the right track. whenvever naguguluhan ako or may problema di ka pa nagsasalita alam na nila. and sya din ang madalas mag reality check sakin if i’m lost na at stuff.
    Aci recently posted…OPPO Launches Mirror 5 + The First Local Ambassador #ASparkOfBrillanceMy Profile

  • Reply Jem Alvarado (@esupermommy) August 17, 2015 at 3:26 pm

    Hi Mommy Maan,

    Congrats to your new blog! To organize my time and have time with important things, I put my family as my top priority. Everything follows…
    Jem Alvarado (@esupermommy) recently posted…Top Volleyball Athletes are the PLDT HOME Ultera New Brand AmbassadorsMy Profile

  • Reply May De Jesus-Palacpac August 17, 2015 at 11:36 pm

    No matter how much we try, there will really be times when we just have to go back to our priorities and let go of the unnecessary. For me, I need to really lessen my FB time.
    May De Jesus-Palacpac recently posted…The Beauty that is Puerto Del SolMy Profile

  • Reply Tina August 18, 2015 at 2:53 pm

    A moms life is always a beautiful mess. The secret is to enjoy every moment of it. It could be frustrating a lot of times because variables change frequently. What kept me sane was knowing my priority- prayerful life for wisdom, health, time. It’s great to reconnect to the source (God) so we could re-align and find our balance to regain peace of mind that were doing the right thing. More power to your blog!!:) we all feel for you!:) cheer up so many things to be thankful for 🙂

  • Reply jErELLt August 18, 2015 at 4:57 pm

    I feel you. I’m giving birth on November, but I still haven’t figured out who will be left with our baby when my husband and I are working. I would have wanted to be a WAHM, but we still can’t afford it because we’re just on the first year of paying for our house amortization. Though I really spend time in the kitchen because I need to pay close attention to what we eat (with a baby and my husband’s cholesterol watch), I can’t find the time to clean our two-month-old house. Plus, I used to blog three times a week and finish reading at least one book in a month, but these things have definitely been placed at the back seat. 😐
    jErELLt recently posted…The Story of the Two Little Kolokoys: The Angel and the SurvivorMy Profile

  • Reply kareen liez August 18, 2015 at 6:21 pm

    My life is in a mess now. My husband had been accusing of cheating and all and it never stops. But I realized shouldn’t let that hinder me to move on with my life and take care of my daughter. I wish I could reclaim my life like you.
    kareen liez recently posted…Unilab Salutes Unsung Heroes in #SalamatSaHusayAtMalasakit Campaign, Encourages Preparedness with Health KitMy Profile

  • Reply Roxi Santiago August 18, 2015 at 11:28 pm

    I really like how you ‘named’ your blog because it’s so true! Life is really messy, even for an “OC” person like me ha. It looks good when I write down plans/ideas/schedules, but life happens and those things are forgotten to tend to the important things.

    Supporting you with homeschooling. We just started last July, nothing formal at all because Jacob is only 4 years old. I just printed out our curriculum online and we do what we can in the day! We’re comfortably homeschooling. Don’t stress yourself over it. 🙂
    Roxi Santiago recently posted…The Santiago Family VLOG #3: Preschool @ The Fort & Dealing with Baby EczemaMy Profile

  • Reply Laineyloveslife August 19, 2015 at 12:00 am

    Becoming a mom surely makes everything a lot different and I’d like to commend you for keeeping yourself sane! I only have 3 things in mind, Maan, when everything seems like not to be going my way. Some things are inevitable, everything has a reason, and there is nothing that prayer can’t fix. 🙂 God does not give us the bad things in this life. He guides us and helps us fix the mess all the time. The technique is to deal with each situation peacefully with clear mind. When you’re tired, rest and wake up with a happy heart. 🙂
    Laineyloveslife recently posted…What’s your lip shape personality?My Profile

  • Reply Steph Vergara August 19, 2015 at 9:38 am

    Take it one step at a time Mommy Maan 🙂

    But also always remember that you need to take good care of yourself first, so you can take good care of others. 🙂

  • Reply Tetcha Figuerres August 19, 2015 at 3:08 pm

    Since I gave up my full-time job, my life has become a little less messy and a bit more organized, and I like it that way. I also have more time to spend with my son, which is great! The downside is I lost my income. Waah! What a joyful mess you’re in, and I guess that’s what makes your life challenging and exciting. Just always ask for strength when you need it from the One Up There. Cheers, Maan!
    Tetcha Figuerres recently posted…Shield Your Children from Illnesses with Ceelin PlusMy Profile

  • Reply Arge August 22, 2015 at 9:10 am

    Hi Maan!

    It really is a struggle to manage the house, a career and take care of your family without letting a few things slide. I am going through some challenges on my own because I am also working full time from the home, we don’t have a yaya or househelp (by choice), and I am planning to homeschool my toddler.

    I’ve been praying to GOD that He will always show me what my priorities are (a regular quiet time with Him, first and foremost) and that He will give me the strength and plenty of grace to fulfil my roles as a wife and mother and put everything else after them. I’m saying the same prayer for you, Maan, and for all the mothers out there 🙂
    Arge recently posted…Amino Fres-C Instant Drink MixMy Profile

  • Reply Ayi August 23, 2015 at 9:09 am

    I don’t even know how I do it. LOL. I’m just a bit lucky these days because yayas are sticking around lately, that’s why I’m able to take care of other equally important things. Just take it one task at a time. Take advantage of your son’s downtime and make sure to take a break! You need and deserve that 🙂
    Ayi recently posted…Review: Paper Moon CakeMy Profile

  • Reply Peachy @ The Peach Kitchen August 27, 2015 at 7:07 am

    Congrats on this new blog Maan. With God as your center I don’t think you can mess anything up.
    Peachy @ The Peach Kitchen recently posted…Meeting Pedro N’ Coi for DinnerMy Profile

  • Reply jared's mum September 1, 2015 at 9:22 am

    Life is really one big, beautiful mess, mum. From this mess, we learn invaluable things about ourselves and about life, so I think it is all for good. My piece of advice is to not be too hard on yourself and give yourself time to breathe. As much as we’d like, we can never really be superheroes and there is only so much we can do. The trick is to know our priorities and everything will fall into place.

    know, too, that you are not alone and we all go through this phase and season in our lives. Revel in the mess and take one step at a time to sort through it and, finally un-mess it! You can do it mum! ^_^
    jared’s mum recently posted…Thoughtful Home Decor Creates An Inviting AmbianceMy Profile

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